Archive for January 2010
1) NOT KISSING FIRST. Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you’re paying by the hour and trying to get your money’s worth by cutting out nonessentials. A proper passionate kiss is the ultimate form of foreplay.
2) BLOWING TOO HARD IN HER EAR. Admit it, some kid at school told you girls love this. Well, there’s a difference between being erotic and blowing as if you’re trying to extinguish the candles on your 50th birthday cake. That hurts.
3) NOT SHAVING. You often forget you have a porcupine strapped to your chin which your rake repeatedly across your partner’s face and thighs. When she turns her head from side to side, it’s not passion, it’s avoidance.
4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST. Most men act like a housewife testing a melon for ripeness when they get their hand on a pair. Stroke, caress, and smooth them.
5) BITING HER NIPPLES. Why do men fasten onto a woman’s nipples, then clamp down like they’re trying to deflate her body via her breasts? Nipples are highly sensitive. They can’t stand up to chewing. Lick and suck them gently. Flicking your tongue across them is good. Pretending they’re a dogie toy, isn’t.
6) TWIDDLING HER NIPPLES. Stop doing that thing where you twiddle the nipples between finger and thumb like you’re trying to find a radio station in a hilly area. Focus on the whole breasts, not just the exclamation points.
7) IGNORING THE OTHER PARTS OF HER BODY. A woman is not a highway with just three turnoffs: Breastville East and West, and the Midtown Tunnel. There are vast areas of her body which you’ve ignored far too often as you go bombing straight into downtown Vagina. So start paying them some attention.
8) GETTING THE HAND TRAPPED. Poor manual dexterity in the underskirt region can result in tangled fingers and underpants. If you’re going to be that aggressive, just ask her to take the damn things off.
9) LEAVING HER A LITTLE PRESENT. Condom disposal is the man’s responsibility. You wore it, you store it.
10) ATTACKING THE CLITORIS. Direct pressure is very unpleasant, so gently rotate your fingers along side of the clitoris.
11) STOPPING FOR A BREAK. Women, unlike men, don’t pick up where they left off. If you stop, they plummet back to square one very fast. If you can tell she’s not there,keep going at all costs, numb jaw or not.
12) UNDRESSING HER AWKWARDLY. Women hate looking stupid, but stupid she will look when naked at the waist with a sweater stuck over her head. Unwrap her like an elegant present, not a kid’s toy.
13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING FOREPLAY. Stroking her gently through her panties can be very sexy. Pulling the Page 1 40 MISTAKES MEN MAKE WHILE HAVING SEX WITH WOMEN material up between her thighs and yanking it back and forth is not.
14) BEING OBSESSED WITH THE VAGINA. Although most men can find the clitoris without maps, they still believe that the vagina is where it’s all at. No sooner is your hand down there than you’re trying to stuff stolen banknotes up a chimney. This is okay in principle, but if you’re not careful, it can hurt so don’t get carried away. It’s best to pay more attention to her clitoris and the exterior ofher vagina at first, then gently slip a finger inside her and see if she likes it.
15) MASSAGING TOO ROUGHLY. You’re attempting to give her a sensual, relaxing massage to get her in the mood. Hands and fingertips are okay; elbows and knees are not.
16) UNDRESSING PREMATURELY. Don’t force the issue by stripping before she’s at least made some move toward getting your stuff off, even if it’s just undoing a couple of buttons.
17) TAKING YOUR PANTS OFF FIRST. A man in socks and underpants is a at his worst. Lose the socks first.
18) GOING TOO FAST. When you get to the penis-in-vagina situation, the worst thing you can do is pump away like an industrial power tool – she’ll soon feel like an assembly-line worker made obsolete by your technology. Build up slowly,with clean, straight, regular thrusts.
19) GOING TOO HARD. If you bash your great triangular hip bones into her thigh or stomach, the pain is equal to two weeks of horseback riding concentrated into a few seconds.
20) COMING TOO SOON. Every man’s fear. With reason. If you shoot before you see the whites of her eyes, make sure you have a backup plan to ensure her pleasure too.
21) NOT COMING SOON ENOUGH. It may appear to you that humping for an hour without climaxing is the mark of a sex god, but to her it’s more likely the mark of a numb vagina. At least buy some intriguing wall hangings, so she has something to hold her interest while you’re playing Marathon Man.
22) ASKING IF SHE HAS COME. You really ought to be able to tell. Most women make noise. But if you really don’t know, don’t ask.
23) PERFORMING ORAL SEX TOO GENTLY. Don’t act like a giant cat at a saucer of milk. Get your whole mouth down there, and concentrate on gently rotating or flicking your tongue on her clitoris.
24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN. Men persist in doing this until she’s eyeball-to-penis, hoping that it will lead very swiftly to mouth-to-penis. All women hate this.It’s about three steps from being dragged to a cave by their hair. If you want her to use her mouth, use yours; try talking seductively to her.
25) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX. Sperm tastes like sea water mixed with egg white. Not everybody likes it.When she’s performing oral sex, warn her before you come so she can do what’s necessary.
Page 2 40 MISTAKES MEN MAKE WHILE HAVING SEX WITH WOMEN 26) MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO. Don’t thrust. She’ll do all the moving during fellatio. You just lie there. And don’t grab her head.
27) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM PORN MOVIES. In X-rated movies, women seem to love it when men ejaculate over them. In real life, it just means more laundry to do.
28) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES. Asking her to be on top is fine. Lying there grunting while she does all the hard work is not. Caress her gently, so that she doesn’t feel quite so much like the captain of a schooner. And let her have a rest.
29) ATTEMPTING ANAL SEX AND PRETENDING IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. This is how men earn a reputatio n for not being able to follow directions. If you want to put it there, ask her first. And don’t think that being drunk is an excuse.
30) TAKING PICTURES. When a man says, “Can I take a photo of you?” she’ll hear the words “__to show my buddies.” At least let her have custody of them.
31) NOT BEING IMAGINATIVE ENOUGH. Imagination is anything from drawing patterns on her back to pouring honey on her and licking it off. Fruit, vegetables, ice and feathers are all handy props; hot candle wax and permanent dye are a no no.
32) SLAPPING YOUR STOMACH AGAINST HERS. There is no less erotic noise. It’s as sexy as a belching contest.
33) ARRANGING HER IN STUPID POSES. If she wants to do advanced yoga in bed, fine, but unless she’s a Romanian gymnast, don’t get too ambitious. Ask yourself if you want a sexual partner with snapped hamstrings.
34) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE. Read this carefully: Anal stimulation feels good for men because they have a prostate. Women don’t.
35) GIVING LOVE BITES. It is highly erotic to exert some gentle suction on the sides of the neck, if you do it carefully. No woman wants to have to wear turtlenecks and jaunty scarves for weeks on end.
36) BARKING INSTRUCTIONS. Don’t shout encouragement like a coach with a megaphone. It’s not a big turn-on.
37) TALKING DIRTY. It makes you sound like a lonely magazine editor calling a 1-900 line. If she likes nasty talk, she’ll let you know
38) NOT CARING WHETHER SHE COMES. You have to finish the job. Keep on trying unt il you get it right, and she might even do the same for you.
39) SQUASHING HER. Men generally weigh more than women, so if you lie on her a bit too heavily, she will turn blue.
40) THANKING HER. Never thank a woman for having sex with you.Your bedroom is not a soup kitchen.
What exactly is premature ejaculation?
Ejaculation that occurs prior to when a man wishes or too quickly during intercourse to satisfy the partner.
When most males ejaculate they tend to quickly lose a usable erection for the simple reason that their discharge has temporarily released a state of elevated sexual tension.
It seems logical that our prehistoric male ancestors were all rapid ejaculators. The Homo Erectus who could couple quickly with his mate and repidly reach ejaculation was then free to deal with enemy tribesman and predatory sabre-toothed tigers. The slowpoke got clubbed or eaten.
Therefore, only rapid ejaculators survived long enough to sire descendants.
Thus, if speed of ejaculation were hereditary, we all should have fast ejaculatory reflexes.
Obviously, the above theory cannot be proven; however, it does contain an element of truth. It is probably “natural” for healthy males to ejaculate quickly. Lasting longer serves no genetic function that we know of.
Lasting is a learned behavior, like learning to dance. It can prolong and intensify pleasure for a man. Also, many women like to experience orgasm -or have been socially conditioned to enjoy orgasm – when the erect penis is inside them. To reach orgasm this way often requires periods of more or less continuous stimulation by the penis.
Premature ejaculation is sometimes also caused or aggrivated psychological factors such as guilt, fear, and performance anxiety.
The first thing a male must hold in mind is that good sex is unhurried sex. The longer he spends in foreplay prior to his first orgasm, the stronger and more enjoyable that first orgasm will be. The compacting of blood in the sex organs builds slowly, inflating the tissues and sensitizing the millions of nerve endings in and around the genitals.
Think of an orgasm like a balloon: the longer you blow air into it, the bigger it gets and the louder the bang when it pops.
Orgasm consists of two stages. One begins with the prostate gland, which encircles the urethra like a tiny donut above the base of the penis, contracts and releases its fluids, along with the contents of the seminal vesicle, into the urethra.
To most males this feels like you are going to start a good sneeze, but it’s too late to stop. Stage two is similar to the sneeze itself. The pelvic muscle contract strongly around the bulb, forcing the fluid out under considerable pressure.
Orgasm is what a man feels when all this is happening. He has probably learned for himself that it is possible to ejaculate without having an orgasm, but he may not yet realize that he can also have an orgasm without ejaculating. That’s exactly what you want to learn to do.
The average male in his twenties takes less than three minutes from the time of insertion till he comes. This cheats him of a lot of fun and satisfaction and doubly cheats the unfortunate female he prematurely has an orgasm into.
How do I prevent premature ejaculation from happening?
The most common treatment of premature ejaculation is to become more familiar with the feelings and sensations surrounding the time leading up to ejaculation.
By learning to become more familiar with these sensations, you can slowly learn how to predict when the upcoming ejaculation will occur and gain more control over them. This is known as your point of no return.
If you want to be able to enjoy long periods of intense pleasure without ejaculation, you need to discover your point of no return. Masturbate and concentrate on you feelings.
There is a point at which you will not be able to control your ejaculation anymore.
At that point, as hard as you try, you cannot stop yourself from ejaculating. You will have to ejaculate because ejaculation is a reflex: your brain sends messages through your spinal cord to your sex organs and orders ejaculation.
Once you have successfully discovered your point of no return do not let your arousal reach this point. You can eithr change your position or stop moving.
Other techniques you may consider are the “stop and start” and the “squeeze” methods.
The “stop and start” method. When, during thrusting, you feel yourself getting closer, cease all movement and press the pubic bone (under your pubic hair) against your mate’s pubic bone, thus pushing your penis in all the way.
Then both stop moving. (Tell her, “Resting time, love.”) When the urgency to ejaculate subsides, start thrusting again. Do this several times in a row.
It can also be practiced solo, using your hand instead of a vagina. A varation of this technique is to make several voluntary twitching movements of the penis while you are resting.
This can be done by rapidly flexing and relaxing the muscles that control the flow of urine.
Try to identify this muscle contraction next time that you urinate. This muscle is known as the PC muscle and is described clearly in the Multiple-Orgasm section below.
The “squeeze technique” method. This method, which has been proven highly successful in training men to last longer described in a book by Dr. Herbert E. Vendervoort and Rev. Ted Mcilvenna. This technique can also be practiced alone during masterbation.
One stimulates himself until he has had a firm erection for a while, squeezes, and repeats the process several times. After several squeezes, one should have much more intense ejaculation than usual.
During the no-intercourse period, the couple should explore one another sensually, caressing one another’s bodies with hands and mouth or by any other means, short of intercourse, that are pleasurable to both.
If the man’s penis becomes erect while his mate is caressing it, she can, at any time that feels right to her, apply the squeeze to his penis. Preferably this should take place before the man feels himself on the verge of ejaculating.
IF the women does the squeeze several times at her descretion, it can become part of her lovemaking technique.
Below are a few of the most frequently asked questions about our manual:
When should I use these techniques?
Whenever you wish. A lot of men do their workout first thing in the morning, and others do it before they go to bed at night. The actual time of day will not affect the process.
Can I ejaculate right before, during, or after exercising?
When you ejaculate your body goes through several chemical and physical changes, first your blood testosterone levels begin to drop, second, all your connective tissues begin to tighten as well, it is best to wait at least several hours after completion of the exercises before ejaculating, just as it is also important not to ejaculate for at least several hours before exercising as well.
When I jelq I get a little, (or a lot) sore, is this normal?
Check the soreness and see what is causing it, you may just need to trim the pubic hair right at the base of your penis. Is it a sharp pain or just a dull discomfort?
Are you doing the hot wraps?
A slight discomfort/soreness is normal and should pass as your penis and all supportive structures get used to the exercises.
Try not to stop, a slight discomfort is normal, if the pain is sharp or is strong enough to keep you from exercising take a few days off from the exercises while continuing to do the hot wraps.
How can I keep from getting erect when jelqing or stretching?
DO NOT JELQ WHEN FULLY ERECT FOR ANY REASON!!!
When you are just starting out on the program your penis is accustomed to getting hard from the stimulation because it is always being used for the same thing, get hard, get stimulated, achieve orgasm and ejaculation. After a couple weeks to a few months your penis will be accustomed to the exercises and the erections should be more controllable.
During these first few weeks if you get an erection take a few seconds or minutes to let it subside, you won’t hurt anything as all these first few weeks are for is so that Mr. Penis, (and you), can get accustomed to the exercises.
Can I do the exercises twice a day?
The ideal heal time for tissues in your body is 48 hours, (depending on the tissue type, muscle tissue is one of the the fastest, nerve tissue is the slowest at 1 to 2 mm a month). When you exercise more than once a day you are not giving Mr. Penis time to heal correctly often times at the sacrifice of growth.
I’m not circumcised, is there anything special I should do to do the exercises?
Not necessarily, there are mainly just two things you should be aware of. First, when jelqing be sure to stop just at the base of the head, second, if you choose you can use your free hand to retract the foreskin then jelq as you normally would.
How do I find my pc muscle?
An easy to find your pc muscle is: When urinating, stop the flow of urine without using your hands, and no, it’s not your anal sphincter or your abdominal muscles. After time you will get good at it and will be able to do it whenever you want, this is flexing your pc muscle.
For starters stop the flow of urine as many times as you can every time you go. After a few days you will be able to do it whenever you want. Try and do as many Kegels as you can every day. Kegels are the exercise that work the pubococcygeal (pc) muscle.
Do I have to do the Hot Wraps?
The hot wrap should not be considered optional as they serve two main purposes.
â€¢ First they serve to loosen connective tissues so they can stretch more easily with less risk of injury.
â€¢ Second the hot wraps serve to increase penile circulation which in turn increases the amount of nutrients that reach your penis.
hen can I expect to see my first gains?
Most begin to see their first gains at around the second week with others seeing gains after their 2nd month, some see gains as soon as the first exercise session. You can expect to see flaccid gains before erect gains as your penis becomes more accustomed to the increased blood flow.
I don’t have enough time to do all the exercises at once, Can I spread them out over the day?
Yes. We know that sometimes it is hard to find the time. If you wish to split the exercises up during the day, then do so.
Why can’t I do the exercises 7 days a week ?
You must rest your penis for two days, This is essential for healing. YOU MUST ALLOW TIME TO HEAL. Many men spend a year or more trying to achieve enlargement, but never seem to grow.
This is because the cells and tissues in your penis, after being stretched in exercise, must have enough adequate time to rejuvenate and build back up. This can only be accomplished through the rest time that you take off each week.
How long can I keep using these techniques?
You can use the program forever if you like. But practically speaking, your penis can only be increased SO much. You will see the most substantial growth within your first 6 months of the program (although some men may need a few months longer). However, after that time your penis may only grow a half inch a year, but there will be a slight size gain.
First of all, it should be noted that one man in 3 ejaculates quicker than he wants to, and that the vast majority of men sometimes ejaculate too quickly. So if this happens to you, you’re hardly alone.
The following are some tips and exercises that will assist you in learning to control this problem:
You can learn to tolerate long periods of sexual pleasure without ejaculating once you learn to recognize the feelings that precede your orgasm.
There is an exercise you can try called The “One to Ten” Approach. Imagine that the scale of pleasure runs from 1 to 10: 1 you are just starting to feel aroused; 10 you have an orgasm and ejaculate.
Therefore 9, the point just before your orgasm, is your point of no return. Try masturbating. When you reach your magic point 8, stop and let the urge to ejaculate subside.
Then start masturbating again. Do this a few times. Masturbate, stop, masturbate. At the end of 15 minutes you can ejaculate (if you wish). Repeat this technique until you are able to enjoy your arousal without ejaculating for 15 minutes.
Another method that reduces the chance of premature ejaculation is one that we mention in your workout- Give Your PC Muscles a Squeeze. Review our discussion of Kegel (PC) Muscles if you’ve forgotten where these muscles are located.
Strong PC muscles operate like a good set of brakes in your car- by contracting the muscles, you can control your arousal the same way you use your brakes to control speed.
In the broadest terms of how to apply this muscle when making love, you prolong orgasms by a simulation of “stopping your urination in midstream”. Learn the powers of these muscles and how to use them. They will work wonders in the bedroom!
Finally, the oldest, simplest & best method for learning ejaculatory control is called the Locking Method.
When having sex, if you feel yourself becoming too excited… simply withdraw your penis from the vagina and pull back so that only the head of your penis remains inside her.
Then just remain motionless for 15 – 30 seconds. Wait for the urge to subside, then back to where you left off.
“Place your thumb on the top of the penis at the root and your index finger at the bottom of the penis at the root. Take a deep breath and while holding, squeeze and grip the shaft of your penis in a wave toward the tip of the penis.
The thumb, the index finger and the pinky finger push, forcing blood into the penis head. Now hold this grip for as long as you’re able to hold your breath. Repeat this exercise 9 times. Each time you hold your breath, count to 9 and with each count, squeeze more toward the head of the penis.”